Twitter plays, part CXLIV

It’s Twitter Plays CXLIV! This week’s assignment was: write a 1-tweet play that features a FAIRY or SPRITE.

Here are your plays starting with @BananaHamBone and the ADHD savior.

@BananaHamBone:
Jesus busted into mass and he started yelling “Fairies” at us. With Holy Swag I replied “Chill, JC… your Ritalin?” JC. “Whoa”

@NickCasalini:
BLACK TINKERBELL: Peter, stop wearing my pants. PAN: Please? BLACK TINKERBELL: I’ll hit you so hard you’ll never never land again.

@mightytoycannon:
A: Who are you? B: Your Fairy Godmother. A: Oh. I thought you’d be more… well…spritely. A: That’s the Toothfairy. Bitch. 

@EricSWat:
A: fairygod mother let the prince pick me F.G. Father appears: kid, this guy is a tool. You cn do better. A: but.. FGF: Drinks? A: ok

@RoQHard:
The Fairy’s Eulogy: Weary fairy reposed on a mound of detritis after lifes long labor Foxfire burns as belief decays and love wanes

@Dramaturgs:
The fairy Robin Goodfellow searched o’er hill & dale for a beverage; then he discovered he was surrounded by Sprites.

@kwarnockny:
A: I am so thirsty. B: I know. It’s really hot. Would you like something to drink? A: I could really use a Sprite. B: Yeah.

@WD405:
Sprite:I need you to obey your thirst, ok? Let your mind succumb to Lemon & Lime. Shhh its ok, don’t fight the bubbles. You’re mine!

@meadowsm:
now here is Skrillexs song”Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites” brought to you by Coke. Then futurists sing song holding Sprites

@loladiana:
Peter Pan raised the gin bottle and with a sickening crunch he finally put an end to the nagging and doe eyes. Kiss me, Smee…

@10000th:
S-Do you have the sprite stuff? s-What’s it take? S-On call round the clock. Heavy lifting. Total anonymity. s-Woot Woot. S-Word.

@mopula1:
Fairy: Eat this mushroom & yr dreams will come true. Celeste: It’ll b illusion. Fairy: What is real? Truth is relative *Celeste eats*

@HeatherMeyer2:
Man: Gross, something Tinkersmells in here. (An angry Tink throws her wand at the man) Man: Ouch! Where did this sliver come from?

2 from @ArmyofWomack:
*Telegenic Actor walks center holding green soda can-opens-drinks* “Ahhhh crisp refreshing: endorsement money.”
&
*several ethereal spritely fairies frolic,flit about,gigling, turn to audience* All: “FUCK GNOMES!” *exit frolicking*

@earbox:
(Gay Mega Man teleports in.) GMM: I am both offensive and a terrible pun. (Gay Mega Man teleports out. End.) 

@therealpineda:
A fairy godmother discovers that she behaves very differently when she sleepwalks, and it’s starting to affect her marriage.

@thelightedbridg:
“Faerie Faerie Faerie,” she hums and walks into mountain. “A bag of teeth.” Thud. Faerie glimmer. Lights way to treasure…

@DrSchneider:
The squirrel drowns himself in a bucket full of sprite.

Suicide is painless, except when there’s carbonation. And that is our ender for this week.

Again, leave more plays in the comments if we left them out, or direct message us at Twitter: @nyneofuturists.

And you can check out previous Twitter Plays here: Favorites at Twitter.